GETTING A LITTLE OLDER

photo by Jessamyn Harris

I propose a new holiday:

“Yer Parents-are -Gettin'-a-Little-Older Day.”

Hallmark could create some cards with congratulatory messages:

Hey, you parents! You’re getting a little older, huh?!
or
Hey, you parents! You slowin’ down or whaaaaaaaahhhhhh?!
or

Parents, we’ve noticed that you guys
have not been helping us move so much.
And you go to bed at 11:00 on New Year’s Eve.

And we’ve noticed that you’re getting a tiny bit soft around the middle.
Pants are hangin’ a little lower, or a little higher depending.

Hey parents, lookin’ a little gray around the temples and more!
Hey, parents, niiiiice new, thicker glasses with “hip” frames.

You're taking more pills for cholesterol and achy backs.
You're "ooooomph-ing” when bending or stretching.
You’re running around less, and napping more.

The day would be celebrated in the childhood homes.
Young adults would feign attentiveness,
listening to tales of yor,
“I remember my 1st computer”,
(which was the young adults’ first computer as well, come to think of it.)

Stories of heavy duty phones with cords all twisted up.
Concert at the Fillmore seeing Ike and Tina Turner.
Favorite ‘60’s musical geniuses hashed over.

Then, there would be time for Where-were-You-When…
“I was in middle school when I first heard...
we huddled in the multi watching tv." (black and white)”

Tales of back in the day.
Before 12 step meetings.
Before yearly physicals.
Before THX.
And worst of all, before DVDs and Myspace.
“We had to GO to the movies.
We had to CALL girlfriends at home.
We had to WRITE letters.”

Yeah, yeah...
The offspring would smile politely
when reminded of the price of gasoline in ’67.
Price of a car in ’71.

“Hey, parents when did you get older?
When did you get wrinkly elbow skin?
When did you finally figure tan was outta style?”

Yer kids are checkin’ in on you,
on Yer Parents are Getting Older Day.

They’re pattin’ your shoulder,

kissin’ your cheek, seein’ you later,

patiently saying goodbye
until the older ears listen.